Overdue

Well, it has been a few days since my last post so I will make this as short as possible. We had Uncle Joe's funeral services on Friday and a funeral reception back at our home afterwards. We pulled it all together in such short timing, and it was great to have a lot of family all in the same place again. It's too bad it had to be under those circumstances though. The last time we had many Joneses and Avala's in one place was for Uncle Joe's mom's funeral in August of 2007. Someone mentioned 'no more for the next 10 years!' That would be nice.

We spent the rest of the weekend visiting with MJ's sister Kim and her family that were in town from Colorado and they stayed with us for a couple nights. I over worked myself cleaning up after the reception on Friday night and also doing stuff here and there around the house to put things back in "Patty's order". My body was hurting so much come Monday morning, but I dragged myself into work anyway. Because face it, I need to make a living.

Things went very awry sortly after I arrived at work. It was all really just a misunderstood mess and just more stress added onto me. One of my team members asked me how I was. I replied "Pretty terrible how about yourself". Well, take it from me - don't ever try to be sincerely honest at work - with people whom are not your friend or family no matter how many times they try to convey "hey we're family here". Because the events that followed just felt like bullying to me. I was given the cold shoulder after my response and so I tried to further explain with sincerity that I was just being honest. (Why do people ask a question if they don't want to genuinely care about the response?) I could tell that offense was taken -- so I asked for a meeting. I was told that it would have to be in the afternoon because they had a busy schedule. So I emailed back in more detail, letting them know that I didn't want to burden their busy schedule and told them all that I wanted to say. Which was an appology for offending them, since that is what it appeared I did. I went onto further detail about the busy weekend I had, that it was emotionally and physically draining - i.e. funeral, 50 people at the house, and lots of laborous clean up. I went furture to even say, as if I was speaking to "family"... that I hurt every day and it's a very hard thing to deal with. I hoped they would never get to a point in their life where you lay in bed at night having thoughts of wishing never waking up because of something natural happening. I said that I was NOT suicidal nor have I ever been, and I would never hurt myself. If something natural happened to me, I would be at peace from the pain.

An hour later I was asked into a meeting and they addressed concern. They think my email was was a cry out for "help" - and so to help me, they asked me to have someone pick me up and take me home and be with me all day. Also, that I can not return to work until I have a doctor's note releasing me back to my duties. My doctor doesn't have an avail. appointment until Thursday morning as of now... I've been calling to try and push the appointment sooner, but no luck. If all goes as scheduled, I will have a very tiny paycheck coming to me, because my work is forcing me not to work, I have no PTO accrued, because I've had to use it as it comes.

I am at home just twittling my fingers and worrying about my job. Oh so fun. But I am just fine, I have no thoughts of wanting to hurt myself, none what so ever... I spent $70 yesterday on natural supplements from Lassens to try and gain some relief from the Fibro. I do not want any prescription drugs.

These are some more fun facts that completely make my work's assessment rediculous: I hate medicine, I do not drink and I can't bare pain - what could I possibly do to myself? LOL

I'm going to go back to the sitting and waiting to get on with my life.

Have a great day!
Love, PJ